Day 2 of the social media detox, and I’m feeling great! I didn’t even have the urge to go on Youtube!
I’m being to realize more and more how social media drastically lowered my self-esteem. When I would scroll through my feed, I would see people I’d met once or twice and find myself envious of their life. It seemed so much more put together than mine.
Mind you, I’m a 31-year-old, happily single gay man who’s beginning to get established in my career. I have manageable debt, consistent income, good credit, and am responsible for only myself.
But when I saw other people’s trips, promotions, babies (which I don’t even want), I would start to feel like my life was missing something important.
The truth is, I am in love with the life I have today. I live in a 400 sqft studio in the middle of Houston and feel a sense of giddy bliss daily.
Fourteen months ago, I lived in a top floor apartment in an affluent area of town with my then fiance. But it was a life I didn’t want. I was spending so much time trying to look like I had it together that I neglected to notice I didn’t recognize who I was anymore.
Nothing to do with my ex; he is a wonderful man. It just wasn’t the right relationship for either of us.
When I moved out, I deactivated my social media again. It hurt too much to talk about, and I was scared that people would start noticing and ask us what happened.
In the months that followed, I re-learned who I was and what I wanted out of life. I stopped comparing myself to strangers and began asking, “what do I what? What is going to make me happy? What is my definition of success?”
As I asked these questions, I also started saying yes to life. Take a crafting class at Paper Source? Yes! Fly to Chicago to see the North American Bahai Temple? Yes! Weekly movie night with some close girlfriends (who are girlfriends)? Absolutely!
The more I followed my joy, the less I cared about what other people were doing. My relationships became so much closer because I would text and call people I hadn’t spoken to in years. We became close again despite taking down my social media.
I’m heading back down that road, and I’m so grateful for it. My life will feel so much richer and meaningful because I will have a real social network that can share in my laughs and hold me when I cry.
Day two of detox and I am delighted with the results.